Liyluy Nishmas Elchonon Tzvi ben R' Yisroel Menachem, Zekaini Moiri R'
Baruch Moshe Aryeh ben Harav Zev Yehuda, Zev Yehuda ben Rav Shmuel
Mordechai, Avraham ben R' Yitzchok Zev, R' Dovid Meir ben Rav Shmuel,
Daniel Feivish ben R' Yaakov Yitzchak, Eliyahu ben R, Mordechai
Haleivi,
In perek chaf tes posuk chaf hei the posuk says "Vayihi baboker vihinei hi Leah, vayomer el Lavan ma zos asisa li halo b'Rachel avaditi imach v'lamah rimisani" "And it was in the morning and behold it was Leah, so he said to Lavan, what is this you have done to me? Was it not for Rachel that i worked for you? Why have you deceived me?"
Rashi explains, that Yaakov only realized in the morning that he had married Leah when he believed he was marrying Rachel, because he had given Rachel "simanim" signs with which she was to identify herself. Rachel however realized the embarrassment Leah would have felt when her father sent her in the place of Rachel, and she would fail to give over the simanim correctly, and gave Leah the simanim.
The Medrash Raba, on the posuk where Rachel names Naftali (lamud, ches) says, that originally when Rachel allowed Leah to marry Yaakov, Rachel said "If I am not deserving of having the world built from me, at least let it be built by my sister".
The Rosh yeshiva ztl asks, what does Rachel mean she is not deserving?How did she know that she did not deserve to the the "Ima" of the world? She was the woman he had planned on marrying, she was the one he had worked so hard to acquire .She just felt she couldn't go along with his plans because she could not bare to cause such pain to her sister, as is explained in the gemora in Megilla. It would seem that she was the rightful zivug, she was not undeserving or the wrong one, she just felt that the right thing to do was to give it up.
The Rosh Yeshiva explains that what Chazal are teaching us, and what rachel was saying was that this marriage was obviously not for her. Rachel was saying that if she was truly supposed to marry Yaakov, Hashem would not have put her in a position where the right thing to do was to give up the simanim. She understood, that it was not " I'm the rightful match just something came up", that something coming up wass a raayah, that that is not the way it is supposed to be. That is why she said "If i am undeserving i may as well let my sister be zoche". "She is not stealing this zechus away from me, because it is not rightfully mine"
I heard from my Rebbe, Rabbi Kaufman shlita what is a davar pashut but so true, and oftentimes forgotten. If a businessman was about to close the biggest deal of his life, when suddenly a a Navi hashem walked in and told him " Do not make that deal it will be a tremendous mistake" The businessman would probably feel indebted to the Navi forever for saving him from this terrible mistake. However, if this same businessman was about to make the biggest deal of his life, and the fellow offering him this deal says " Ill see you Saturday morning to close the deal, and I don't want to hear any excuses if you're not there you can kiss this deal goodbye". Although the businessman would not go, he would probably hate Shabbos for the rest of his life. We all are guilty of this on one level or another. Shouldn't the businessman realize that Shabbos is Hashem's way of telling him "Don't do the deal", it is the same as the Navi Hashem just in a little disguise. There are times in our lives when we may have grand plans of how things in our life will work out, but how we think they will end up and how they do, are many times completely different. So many times if we just take a moment to realize that the fact that things didn't work out the way we thought they would is because Hashem being the loving father that he is causes things to happen sometimes hold us back from what we think we want in order to do what is truly best for us. This is not to say that one should not feel any pain, as we said recently "when it hurts we cry" and I'm sure Rachel was deeply grieved to be unable to marry Yaakov, yet she understood that not marrying him was the right thing, it was what Hashem wanted. We should be zoche to see the not so obvious yad Hashem in all aspects of our life, but especially when things may seem to be the opposite of what we had hoped for. Good Shabbos